couch, why?
-lunch time-
Me: I thought about getting a leather couch because you can vacuum it
Him: ....or you could just not let your dog on it
*I wash my apple in the sink*
Me: ...the only reason I even have a couch is for watching Netflix with my dog
Me: I thought about getting a leather couch because you can vacuum it
Him: ....or you could just not let your dog on it
*I wash my apple in the sink*
Me: ...the only reason I even have a couch is for watching Netflix with my dog
Instant Karma
Bettie and I playing fetch.
She drops her ball by accident and then pees on it.
Another dog steals it.
Instant karma.
Muaha.
PIPES!
Woman at the dog park (yelling at her puppy): Piper! PIPER! Give her the ball back!
Me(in my mind): .......um....I'm sorry my gaydar is going off the charts here.
Her: PIPES!
Me: Ok, seriously?!
Can I have your number?
Check!
Go to gym?
Check.
Kiss cute girl at dance party?
Check.
Cute girl likes dogs?
Check.
Love your job?
Check!
Oh life!
You are so good to me!
Because
Puppy snuggles when you are sick.
Because:
A. Puppy can't get your flu
B. Puppy doesn't care that you look like a zombie
C. Puppy has to earn it's keep somehow(jk jk)
Alarm Clock
hahaha
