Coconut! Not coco-not!
Opened my first ever real coconut with my baaaaaaaaaare hands!
Ok, fine.
I used a knife.
I'm still a badass!
and then I dance around like this in a victorious manner:
My best friend's wedding
Me: So I am going to my besties wedding next week! I'm soooooo stoked! Can't wait for the bachelorette party! It's going to be *aaaaamazinggggg*!!!
*he laughs*
Me: I haven't had a drink in like....4....almost 5 weeks
Him: Haha oh ya! You have been green juicing! You are going to absorb it all! Oh man hahaha!
Me: I am going to have like one glass of champagne and be waaaaaaasted
*he laughs*
Me: I haven't had a drink in like....4....almost 5 weeks
Him: Haha oh ya! You have been green juicing! You are going to absorb it all! Oh man hahaha!
Me: I am going to have like one glass of champagne and be waaaaaaasted
I should practice haha
MONTREAL TRIP 2015 WOOOOOOOOOYEAAAAHHHHHBABY!
Me: Did I tell you I'm going to Montreal again?!!!
Him: For?
Me: Get drunk! Make out with hot girls! Dance all night!
Him: I want to come!
Me: You would make an excellent wingman!
Him: I don't want to be a wingman! I want to make out with hot girls!
Me: I was going to say, "I only know lesbians" but that's actually not true. They are like, "I'm French. I do whatever the f*** I want!"
Him: Haha!
Him: For?
Me: Get drunk! Make out with hot girls! Dance all night!
Him: I want to come!
Me: You would make an excellent wingman!
Him: I don't want to be a wingman! I want to make out with hot girls!
Me: I was going to say, "I only know lesbians" but that's actually not true. They are like, "I'm French. I do whatever the f*** I want!"
Him: Haha!
it's true
plaid: the official lesbian flag
My fashionable lesbian friend: I never wear plaid
Me: Me either!
Innocent straight girl: Whaaa? That's weird. It's so trendy!
*lesbian friend and I exchange knowing glances*
Lesbian friend(grinning): It means something else when we wear it!
Me: Me either!
Innocent straight girl: Whaaa? That's weird. It's so trendy!
*lesbian friend and I exchange knowing glances*
Lesbian friend(grinning): It means something else when we wear it!
Not really....kind of....maybe
Me: I'm wearing this long pink dress to the wedding. I was going to wear the green one but I think it's too slutty.
Her: Green one?
Me: Really tight and like *cat/tigress motions in the air*
Her: Ohhhh ya I know that one. I like the lace one!
Me: Lace one? OH! THE lace one!
Her: Ya!
Me: Hahaha I can't wear that to a wedding! That dress is like *I throw my hands up in the air*, "I'M SINGLE!!!"
Her: Green one?
Me: Really tight and like *cat/tigress motions in the air*
Her: Ohhhh ya I know that one. I like the lace one!
Me: Lace one? OH! THE lace one!
Her: Ya!
Me: Hahaha I can't wear that to a wedding! That dress is like *I throw my hands up in the air*, "I'M SINGLE!!!"
hmmm.....aaaaactually....haha
joking.
mostly joking.
Meatatarian
Me: Are you vegan now? I've never seen you eat meat.....only cheese haha and fries
Him: I'm meatatarian
Me: Haha seems legit. That's what I heard on the street. You minx.
Him:I don't want any vegetables harmed
Him: I'm meatatarian
Me: Haha seems legit. That's what I heard on the street. You minx.
Him:I don't want any vegetables harmed
