Blog

no blank space for your name

When you called me crazy it made me laugh.

Firstly, because I took it as a compliment.

And secondly, I'm disappointed in your lack of literary creativity!

At least be like, "Bedlamite! Nefarious artist lesbian with raw-vegan tendencies! She shaved her head once in an act of foreswearing to the anti-heteronormative construct! Her shower is painted with wild flowers!"

dating confused women

*long time ago*

Her(flirting): Want to come over ;)? Don't tell anyone. No one knows I'm dating you.
Me: I would never "out" you.
Her: Oh, I'm not gay!

HAHAHAHAHA.
Good talk.

crash into me

I reckon short sundresses and puppies are responsible for 15-20% of distracted driving car accidents.

(and Ruby Rose is responsible for the other 80%)

closet case

Her: I'm hitting the gym
Me: Nice! I'm going too!
-2.5 hours later-
Her: How was your workout?
Me: Haven't made it to the gym yet.... got distracted playing dress up hahaha
Her: You are such a giirrrrrrlllllll

there's definitely one closet I really like being in

How I Lost 10lb this month

Me after I realized winter was over:

You guys, I wish I could say "Ohhhhh you know I just watched Netflix, ate loads of salty carbs, used my dog as a memory-foam-type pillow, and the weight just was carried off my body by angels....Victoria Secret Angels.....ya!"

But that would be a lie.

So. Here is the truth.

Firstly, I stopped drinking wine(sad faaaaace).