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What It's Like Being A Lesbian Fashion Designer

I know I have been talking a lot lately about being gaaaaaay. But ya know what? I kept it all inside for 27 years. In fact hiding it pretty much became me. For example, here is typical dialogue I would have in my head while casually shopping:
"Oooo! Cute tank top! High-low hem! It fits well! Nice print on the front of tropical birds. Maybe I should buy it. But it's grey melange. Grey...hummm......is that a lesbian thing? What if someone from work see's it and they figure out that I'm gay. Omg no one likes lesbians! My life will be over! This grey tank top will ruin my life! AHHH!!! Get me out of this store!"

Whooooahhh, eh? So ya. My life is much much simpler now. I feel calm. And the words are pouring out of me now that it's not taking my ENTIRE being to hide this one teeeeny tiiiiiny part of myself.
Plus, dating women is the best thing ever. Ever.
Ever.
And I want to share that with all of you!
Because you are beautiful and lovely and supportive.

Coming out is the most terrifying thing I have ever done. More terrifying than when I was 20 years old and moved to New York alone with only $500 in my pocket and lived with 3 other girls in a one bedroom apartment and slept on a 1 ft wide blow up river raft which would deflate during the night and I did an unpaid internship in Soho and then one of the 3 roommates got MRSA(anti-biotic resistant flesh eating disease) and I had to flee the country. Yup. Scarier than that! So scary I had to create the world's longest run-on-nightcap-of-a-sentence!!! The response I've received from both my new fashion design job and with friends and family has literally been 100% positive.

So on that note I shall say goodnight. Have a great week you guys and also thanks for all the support you have been showing me. Love.

For more about me coming out of the closet:

Styling Snoop Dogg in LA

The Italian lady with long painted fingernails hold up a pair of black leather ass-less chaps. "What do you think of these?" she asks. I shake my head no and laugh.
We are in a back room on Melrose Avenue with tables of finger-less driving gloves, fine Italian suits, button up shirts, Prada sunglasses, and chains. 
Here's the music video all a y'all. Sans ass-less chaps lol. Hopefully you can enjoy it anyways! haha:)


Shit Drunk People Say

"WE'RE YOUNG AND WIIIIIILDDDD AND FREEEEEEEEEE!!!"I bring you todays post from my kitchen where I am dancing, singing, typing, and eating mango at the same time!!! Cause I'm a multi-tasking wizard-ess!
Just got up at 1 in the afternoon. Probably against the bylaw to have this much fun.
Re: http://brandymars.blogspot.ca/2014/07/the-fun-police-are-cracking-down.html

So in honour of the long weekend:
SHIT DRUNK PEOPLE SAY!

Me: My Dad says to say thanks for helping me move in
Man in elevator: I don't want to date your Dad!
*awkward silence*
Man in elevator: I don't know why I said that.

In line at the bar
Her: My name is Arriba.
(She looks deeply into his eyes)
Her: Like the chip.
(He looks deep into her eyes)
Him: No way! That's my favourite chip! Restaurant style.

Vegan Dyke!

Yes! I said the word dyke! I get to and you don't! Because I am one!

In fact I have been frolicking around my neighbourhood yelling it the way I yelled the "F" word and frolicked around when I was 4(the only spanking I clearly remember).
So, yes! I am a vegan. It started when I quit by job, threw my stuff in a u-haul(insert lesbian u-haul joke here) and moved about 4 months ago. Something magical happened after I arrived in this great beautiful land of freedom called *drum roll*  not giving a damn anymore!

And the following things happened:
1. I became vegan(ish)
2. I stopped dating guys and starting dating incredibly hot women
3. I became insanely happy

So why are lesbians vegan?
Well. I will tell you.
Personally, I never liked cooking meat. And the only meat I would buy did not resemble an animal in any way. Basically chicken breasts. For a long time I ate eat meat for one main reason: It doesn't have carbs in it. And no one will love you if you aren't skinny. Right?...Right? No, actually that is bullshit. BUT something else magical happened after I moved. I realized I want to date people who are awesome and actually like ME. Not just what I look like. And no, I am not going to gain 50 pounds and shave my head. Actually I might shave my head lol but ya I guess this thing happened called *maturity* ooooOOOOooooo which for me involved another thing called *owning it*. Aka rocking what you have. I'm pretty down with what I have. Getting older is awesome. I wish I had figured this out about 10 years ago.
The other reason I stopped eating meat is because it's unethical. I watched one too many Netflix documentaries. Or perhaps exactly enough! I was convinced.
I also decided after moving to live a more positive and peaceful life and eating animals that were treated badly doesn't fit into this plan.
Also you will live longer. There are many books on this. Raw vegans have very few illnesses.
And I have boatloads of energy and feel awesome:) So you know, do what works for you!:)
And my skin looks awesome now. I used to get hives and now I don't.
So I can't tell you why all dykes are vegan. But that is why I am. And I am pretty sure I'm not alone here.

Tinder Vs. Plenty Of Fish. Notes from a seasoned sailor-ess.

TINDER:
She punches me in the arm. Kinda hard. It hurts but she follows it up with, "Shut up! You are so cute. You make me nervous." And then she giggles. We both cheshire cat smile. Cobbles underneath our feet. I was teasing her about something-hence the punch-but I can't remember what now....she has nice hair. I'm distracted. Old staircases hang off the heritage buildings. "Want a sip of my beer?"She raises her eyebrows. Eyebrows. We talk about eyebrows. Bits of the night fly back into my memory. Yes, she has man eyebrows she says. We laugh. We laugh and laugh and laugh. This is good. More of this please.

Instant rewind 4 years:
PLENTY OF FISH:
He opens the door. 35 pairs of sneakers in boxes arranged  by his front door. He says he is a nurse. Riiiiight. You aren't fooling anyone buddy, but ok. We sit on his couch. I have known him for about 30 minutes.
Him: "Do you have any piercings?"
Me: "Ears, you?"
He pulls out his Netherlands from his pants to show me it is pierced.
Me: "WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING?"
I leave.
Who does that on a first date?! WHO?! Gross.


Lesbian High Fives

Woman at work: So what do you do on the weekends since you are new to town?
Me: I go to the beach and hang out with some friend I have made. I'm also seeing someone. It's new but really great!
Woman at work: Oh nice! What's his name?
Me: Actually, I am dating a woman.
Woman at work: Awesome! 
She high fives me!
She high-fived me!!!!!!
A colleague in the fashion industry gave me a sincere high five for dating a woman!
I WON! 
Then I danced around my desk in a whimsical fashion throwing glitter everywhere and bear hugging people. 
Ok fine, I didn't. But I wanted to!