sweet nothings
*texting my gf when I'm sick*
Me: I have husky man jazz smoker voice. The best part of being sick #winning
Her: Sexy!
Me: I want to whisper sexy things in your ear. Like *grilled cheese*
Her: Stop it you're getting me worked up ;)
Me: Hahaha
Me: I have husky man jazz smoker voice. The best part of being sick #winning
Her: Sexy!
Me: I want to whisper sexy things in your ear. Like *grilled cheese*
Her: Stop it you're getting me worked up ;)
Me: Hahaha
for you
Her: Waking up next to you every morning sounds pretty amazing. Put me down for that
Me: I would move half the sh** out of my closet for you
Her: Hahaha that's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me
Me: It is the highest form of a compliment from a fashion designer
Me: I would move half the sh** out of my closet for you
Her: Hahaha that's the most romantic thing anyone has ever said to me
Me: It is the highest form of a compliment from a fashion designer
Only Naked Friend
I don't like the term "partner".
It makes me feel like we are joint owners of a vacuum cleaner repair shop.
"Girlfriend" doesn't really clarify anything either.
And generally just leads to further questions.
And you deserve better than that.
You deserve something that isn't tarnished yet.
Which is why I call you my "naked friend".
Only naked friend.
Cats: the lesbian gateway drug to denim vests
There was theeeee cutest small white cat with a tiny bright pink nose at the pet food store when I went to buy dog food......
NO!
No Brandy!
You will not become a crazy cat lesbian! Put it back!
special delivery
-texting the girl I'm dating-
Me: What's your address?
*she sends it to me*
Me: I'm going to glue a stamp to my forehead and go sit on a mailbox
Me: What's your address?
*she sends it to me*
Me: I'm going to glue a stamp to my forehead and go sit on a mailbox
Style
*9am Saturday morning*
Giant car crash outside my apartment. Smashed car flipped on it's side.
And also, an elderly man wearing jeans, a pink tutu, and house slippers.
I like his style haha
