Why Is Everything Dirty? WHYYYYYYYYYY
-London, England-
running through Piccadilly station
in herringbone fishnet tights and a very short dress
after having a refreshing Saturday morning stretch and going, "Mmmmm Saaaaaturday"
I went , "OhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnooooOOOOOoooooo!!!!"
And frantically scrambled to piece together a job interview outfit after 6 solid days of interviews
WHY IS EVERYTHING DIRTY WHYYYYYYYY
when I arrive at the door the man asks me for my resume
I don't have it
1200 other applicant line the fancy entrance
there are only 25 spots being filled
a few minutes later they lead me upstairs
to a giant room with a chandelier
I sit on cushioned chair
I fill out an online pre-screening test for personality
the man brings me a glass of water in a wine glass
it soothes my burning throat from the run
I try to cover my legs with my cropped motorcycle jacket
as sweat runs down the side of my face
I decide, in a fit of defeat
that I am screwed.
and I will just enjoy sitting in this nice room with a fancy chandelier.
I relax.
the lady interviewing me asks me questions and then laughs and laughs
she calls another man over and we shake hands
he calls another woman over
we chat, she laughs, we shake hands
and she calls another woman over
an hour later I meet the President of the company.
I got the job!
running through Piccadilly station
in herringbone fishnet tights and a very short dress
after having a refreshing Saturday morning stretch and going, "Mmmmm Saaaaaturday"
I went , "OhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnooooOOOOOoooooo!!!!"
And frantically scrambled to piece together a job interview outfit after 6 solid days of interviews
WHY IS EVERYTHING DIRTY WHYYYYYYYY
when I arrive at the door the man asks me for my resume
I don't have it
1200 other applicant line the fancy entrance
there are only 25 spots being filled
a few minutes later they lead me upstairs
to a giant room with a chandelier
I sit on cushioned chair
I fill out an online pre-screening test for personality
the man brings me a glass of water in a wine glass
it soothes my burning throat from the run
I try to cover my legs with my cropped motorcycle jacket
as sweat runs down the side of my face
I decide, in a fit of defeat
that I am screwed.
and I will just enjoy sitting in this nice room with a fancy chandelier.
I relax.
the lady interviewing me asks me questions and then laughs and laughs
she calls another man over and we shake hands
he calls another woman over
we chat, she laughs, we shake hands
and she calls another woman over
an hour later I meet the President of the company.
I got the job!
and then I danced around like this:
It's not my box.
-Nighttime, in Jamaica-
He takes a sip of rum as the hot breeze dries my salty wet hair.
I play with the sand between my toes wiggling them back and forth.
Him: Can I tell you something?
Me: What's up?
He takes a sip of rum as the hot breeze dries my salty wet hair.
I play with the sand between my toes wiggling them back and forth.
Him: Can I tell you something?
Me: What's up?
-he looks at me-
Him: Your sister told me about your breakup. Sounded really bad.
-I look down at my French manicure-
Him: You keep trying to fit into this box.... dating these guys.... Forget about what people think! You are a free spirit and an artist. Live the life you want to live! Do it your way.
So, I did.
Girl On Girl
You guys need to check out this chick.
I love telling people about kick ass queer people/things/places I discover.
So.
Check out Lauren Lowther. I found her on Youtube. Pretty sure she lives in Toronto. Don't know her personally but she has a crazy good voice. Also, from her videos where she talks about being gay she seems like a super chill funny nice person. (I should probably put some commas in that last sentence but I don't feel like it muaaaahaahaa)
So ya, she's a total babe haha
This cover is super rad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XssXjBhN5Ho
Also, if you have been living under a rock (no offence meant, just being a cheeky smart ass! haha)
You have to check out Macklemore, because his lyrics are thoughtful and he's making a HUGE difference to youth. His music is from the heart and deep. Not all of it. Some of it is silly good times.
So basically he's the best.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVBg7_08n0
And here is some dark, real shit. If you are so inclined.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ru-LgSvOCrE
Oh, jeesh I almost forgot
also check out the Documentary "Girl On Girl" about femme lesbians and culture
suuuuuper interesting:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRrr94ym6M4
I love telling people about kick ass queer people/things/places I discover.
So.
Check out Lauren Lowther. I found her on Youtube. Pretty sure she lives in Toronto. Don't know her personally but she has a crazy good voice. Also, from her videos where she talks about being gay she seems like a super chill funny nice person. (I should probably put some commas in that last sentence but I don't feel like it muaaaahaahaa)
So ya, she's a total babe haha
This cover is super rad:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XssXjBhN5Ho
Also, if you have been living under a rock (no offence meant, just being a cheeky smart ass! haha)
You have to check out Macklemore, because his lyrics are thoughtful and he's making a HUGE difference to youth. His music is from the heart and deep. Not all of it. Some of it is silly good times.
So basically he's the best.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hlVBg7_08n0
And here is some dark, real shit. If you are so inclined.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ru-LgSvOCrE
Oh, jeesh I almost forgot
also check out the Documentary "Girl On Girl" about femme lesbians and culture
suuuuuper interesting:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRrr94ym6M4
Aaaaand here's a pic of some hot lesbians!
...for no particular reason actually.
Just felt like you deserved some.
Happy Thursday.
Check out my unique, funny, LGBTQ greeting cards, cups, and more here!
Out There
-laying in bed in the dark texting-
Me: Do you think I'm too "out there"?
Him: No, you should keep writing
Me: It has to be real....or what is the point? Plus, not everyone has a voice to write about being gay. I am lucky to be in a safe-ish environment
Him: That is true
Me: Do you think I'm too "out there"?
Him: No, you should keep writing
Me: It has to be real....or what is the point? Plus, not everyone has a voice to write about being gay. I am lucky to be in a safe-ish environment
Him: That is true
Recipe For Fun
1 part Brandelion
1 part Brandelion's best friend
3 parts vodka
One part piss and vinegar
12 units laughter
7 giggle fits
2 pranks
4 spontaneous dance parties in the street
8 minutes loud singing
1 part Brandelion's best friend
3 parts vodka
One part piss and vinegar
12 units laughter
7 giggle fits
2 pranks
4 spontaneous dance parties in the street
8 minutes loud singing
shake
stir
enjoy
Deal Breakers
1. Cheaters.
Seriously nothing in the entire world makes me more upset than this. Not happy? BREAK UP! Or, be in an open relationship or a poly relationship. If you cheat on your significant other, I don't want to be your friend. It's not "complicated". You are a selfish ass. We are done.
2. Choosing a guy over a friend
If we are friends and I show you the creepy texts your boyfriend sends me at 2am asking me if I sleep naked and you choose to stay with him and won't talk to me anymore. And then you start sending me messages after you guys break up all like, "Oh hey friend!". Ummmm no. Our friendship is over.
3. If we are friends and I find out you are talking shit about me to other people. I won't be texting you back EVER. Don't expect an angry email from me explaining either. You aren't even worth it.
Seriously nothing in the entire world makes me more upset than this. Not happy? BREAK UP! Or, be in an open relationship or a poly relationship. If you cheat on your significant other, I don't want to be your friend. It's not "complicated". You are a selfish ass. We are done.
2. Choosing a guy over a friend
If we are friends and I show you the creepy texts your boyfriend sends me at 2am asking me if I sleep naked and you choose to stay with him and won't talk to me anymore. And then you start sending me messages after you guys break up all like, "Oh hey friend!". Ummmm no. Our friendship is over.
3. If we are friends and I find out you are talking shit about me to other people. I won't be texting you back EVER. Don't expect an angry email from me explaining either. You aren't even worth it.
