Lesbian pregnancy
Me(laughing): So the other day one of my guy friends offered to donate his sperm when/if I want to have a kid
My Mom: Haha! Well, don't wait too long!
Me: I still have tons of time!
My Mom: Haha! Well, don't wait too long!
Me: I still have tons of time!
I have 99 problems
(actually I have way less than that....maybe like 2-3 on a super bad day....)
but unplanned pregnancy isn't one of them!
#lesbianwin
(actually I have way less than that....maybe like 2-3 on a super bad day....)
but unplanned pregnancy isn't one of them!
#lesbianwin
GBF
*run into my gay best friend*
Him: Oooooooo! I love your top! That colour is good on you!
Me: Thanks! I've actually had it a long time. I just always wore a cardigan during the winter
Him(suave voice): You should only wear that. Just the top(cracking a smile)and nothing else
*I give him sexy eyes*
Me(laughing): Oh, I will!
Him: Oooooooo! I love your top! That colour is good on you!
Me: Thanks! I've actually had it a long time. I just always wore a cardigan during the winter
Him(suave voice): You should only wear that. Just the top(cracking a smile)and nothing else
*I give him sexy eyes*
Me(laughing): Oh, I will!
No place like home
I love being at home. Am I getting old? Haha
Grand lettuce theft
Dear lady casually grazing on lettuce in the organic fresh produce section of the health food store,
How many years in prison do you get for grand lettuce theft? Is this your first felony? Did you steal the golden beet last time?
Ciao,
Brandy
How many years in prison do you get for grand lettuce theft? Is this your first felony? Did you steal the golden beet last time?
Ciao,
Brandy
(P.s. I wish you had looked this satisfied)
(Also, I wish you had been wearing a cat sweater like this)
(....there's always tomorrow)
no blank space for your name
When you called me crazy it made me laugh.
Firstly, because I took it as a compliment.
And secondly, I'm disappointed in your lack of literary creativity!
At least be like, "Bedlamite! Nefarious artist lesbian with raw-vegan tendencies! She shaved her head once in an act of foreswearing to the anti-heteronormative construct! Her shower is painted with wild flowers!"
dating confused women
*long time ago*
Her(flirting): Want to come over ;)? Don't tell anyone. No one knows I'm dating you.
Me: I would never "out" you.
Her: Oh, I'm not gay!
Her(flirting): Want to come over ;)? Don't tell anyone. No one knows I'm dating you.
Me: I would never "out" you.
Her: Oh, I'm not gay!
HAHAHAHAHA.
Good talk.
Good talk.
