Yolo
-we sit on my couch drinking red wine-
She casually takes her hair out of a pony tail. It smells nice-like shampoo. She has inquisitive eyes and perfect skin like a doll.
She casually takes her hair out of a pony tail. It smells nice-like shampoo. She has inquisitive eyes and perfect skin like a doll.
Her: So, what made you decide to come out of the closet?
Me: I guess I am nearing 30....also a bunch of people I knew who were all under 40 suddenly died from random causes. It freaked me out. I guess I was just like, "You only live once!"
Her: Did you just yolo?
Me: What is yolo?
Wooo!
Woke up from an epic nap aaaaaand
I am on the mend!!!
Exciting for 3 reasons:
1. Being sick is incredibly boring
2. We are starting designing a new season at work which is suuuuuuuper awesome and I'm stoked!
3. I had no fun stories to tell you guys anymore and now I will!
I am on the mend!!!
Exciting for 3 reasons:
1. Being sick is incredibly boring
2. We are starting designing a new season at work which is suuuuuuuper awesome and I'm stoked!
3. I had no fun stories to tell you guys anymore and now I will!
To celebrate I am going to wash my hair! Maybe even shave my legs(gasp!)!
Being healthy rocks!
Lesbian T-shirt Project
Disclaimer: I wrote this on a high dosage of nighttime Nyquil. Anything that doesn't make sense I blame on my labradoodle, Bettie. Because she could get away with murder. Have you seen her face!?
So without further delay! (drum roll)
***Shirts that subtly say, "Hey, I'm a lesbian! Come talk to me! Then we will u-haul it, adopt 3 kittens, throw a vegan potluck, and snuggle every morning for ever and ever!"***
(see! I told you!)
So without further delay! (drum roll)
***Shirts that subtly say, "Hey, I'm a lesbian! Come talk to me! Then we will u-haul it, adopt 3 kittens, throw a vegan potluck, and snuggle every morning for ever and ever!"***
Because let's be honest the plaid/undercut/skrillex, short nails, tuque thing isn't working. It's winter. Grunge is in style. I have long long hair and even though I'm missing 1/4th of it (re: http://brandymars.blogspot.ca/2014/08/shaved-my-head-lesbian-haircuts-for.html) I still look really really straight. Sigh.
And sometimes femmes just want to go to a bar and share that moment where you look at someone and go, "Ah nice, you are one of us!"
This happened a lot to me in Montreal. But now, never.
I am *invisible*
I am *invisible*
But, much like the dexterous cuttlefish we will take this challenge and run..errrr swim with it!
And so, the lesbian t-shirt project:
Not so much sapphic subtlety here. But pretty funny.
http://www.zazzle.ca/cover_me_in_chocolate_and_feed_me_to_the_lesbians_tshirt-235958652541865756
You aren't gay. You just love Ellen. And rainbows. Shiny rainbows. That spell the word Ellen. Ok fine you are gay.
How cute is this old dude?! Adorable. I love old people.
Also, Stonewall is a great charity. Check them out.
Ok. This one might not be lesbian per say. But it's hilarious. And if you were wearing it around me I would probably hit on you.
Nothing says "I'M GAY! TALK TO MEEEE!" quite like an Autostraddle shirt. If you don't know what Autostraddle is go RIGHT THIS MINUTE and check it out. But come back after.....cause I love you....and I will miss your face
http://autostraddle.goodsie.com/
http://autostraddle.goodsie.com/
Ha!
This one is pretty funny too.
These underwear aren't really helpful in identifying publicly as a lesbian. But they are super cute.
And if you are getting naked-ish with someone this would put their worries to rest haha
Omg I need antibiotics but don't want to take/go get them.
aGHhhh being stubborn and sick sucks
ciao guys
That's sick yo
Me normally: I am a strong independent woman! Rrrrrrr!
Me today:
First person to bring me chicken soup and hugs wins an endless supply of my love and affection haha
What are you wearing
Actually baby, the most heinous pair of flannel pyjamas ever.
Not this:
The death flu that has been traveling through the office has finally finally gotten me.
I thought I had escaped it! And just as I went, "MUAAhahahaha! I won!" I started to feel it in my throat. Flu, I shake my fist at you!
There are really only two options for me tomorrow at work:
1. Take cold medicine which doesn't really work and makes me suuuuper out of it
2. Don't take cold medicine. Cry internally all day because my throat hurts so bad.
I instinctually can't skip work even if I look like I escaped from the crypt.
It's quite tragic. Damn morals. Always messing up my chances for a great day of hooky.
Please don't tell me you don't know Feris Bueller's Day Off.
It only has the most epic fringe vest of ALL TIME in it.
Passing out now.
so sleep..yy.....
Nyquil my frie..
frien
d..
Types Of Lesbians (stereotypes)
There is confusion in the streets. People want to know. But they don't want to ask.
So here you go. I shall explain some lesbian labels and stereotypes.
Although as Ellen once said, "I don't like labels. The only thing I label is my lunch. I write "lesbian" on it so everyone knows it's mine."
Illustrated with cats.....cause lesbians love cats.....stereotype numero uno haha
Dress quite "masculinely"(Hey! Don't punch my arm! I used quotation marks!)
Don't wear makeup
Often quite sporty
Short hair
I think this is what most people think when they hear the word "lesbian"
(bahaha I f***ing love Bjork)
Femme/incognito:
Suuuuper feminine
Wear makeup
Wear dresses, lace, etc
Like high heels
Generally have long-ish hair
No one believes they are gay
No one suspects they are gay
Men assume they want to have a 3some with them and their gf (WE DON'T!) We might steal your girlfriend though. Watch out. Haha
No really. Watch out
No really. Watch out
....wait a minute that's not a cat.....
Baby Dyke:
A lesbian who just came out of the closet
Still figuring everything out
awww
A lesbian who just came out of the closet
Still figuring everything out
awww
Chapstick lesbian/boi/soft butch:
Sometimes are mistaken for boys
Dress in button up shirts, bow ties, blazers
Short hair
These are of course stereotypes and people are people and are complex. And I have VASTLY simplified the lesbionic world....please don't send me hate mail haha. I do like cookies though. You can send me cookies.
